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Here are some insanely sinister cheesefests that should satisfy any B flick lover’s cravings. With the titanic success of Conan and the Beastmaster I guess it’s only natural that the Cannon Group find their fingers in the pie. These films are both Italian productions. Hey, why not? After all, the Italians had the market cornered on sword and sandal flicks aid in the day. Writer/Director “Lewis Coates”(American companies insisted on Italian directors to utilize more American sounding pseudonyms) is actually Luigi Cozzi, who as everyone knows, directed the box office smashes Starcrash and everyone’s celebrated exploding chest flick, Contamination. Both movies behold like they were shot at the same time, and actually feel more like a three hour film than two seperate ones. The first film starts with some poppycock about astronomy, then has Zeus creating our hero to shift the good/evil balance. Hercules falls in like however and goes after his treasure who has been kidnapped by the heinous King Minos. Minos constantly rants about the power of science over that of the gods even though he’s constantly using supernatural means to do his deeds. Not to mention that he wants Herc’s girl as a sacrifice to a phoenix fire-god. On his quest Hercules flexes, bends swords, fights giant windup toys, battles stock footage, punches everyone, throws styrofoam boulders, throws a grizzly beget into outer residence, breaks swords on his shins, grows sizable, seperates Africa from Europe, and refuses the advances of two women(one of them Sybil Danning!) How pleasurable. Once Minos is defeated and his chick saved, Zeus kinda impartial plucks him into outer spot and turns him into a flexing constellation, storing him for further exhaust. In the second film, Zeus releases him from his suspended flex pose to retrieve seven thunderbolts(they’re actually lightning bolts, not that you really give a crap) stolen by renegade gods, Poseidon, Hera and Aphrodite. These gods resurrect the rank King Minos who’s serene using magic whilst flapping his gums about the power of science. Once again Hercules flexes, punches alot of folks, fights slime people and a guy in a makeshift Chewbacca outfit, doesn’t hit on either of the two chix who would gladly have him, turns titanic again, and transforms into an fascinating gorilla for some unknown reason to fight the final battle. Classic. Cozzi’s imagination clearly exceeds his budget, but that’s fraction of the magic of these films. Both films have tons of scenes in outer state with characters standing on rocky sets which are supposed to be the moon(Mythology tells us the gods hung out on Mount Olympus, but they hang out on the moon in the first film. By the second film they’re supposed to be on Olympus, but it aloof looks an bad lot like the moon to me.) Also lots of superimposed shots of the actors on top of the earth. There are constant scenes of flashing lights and animation accompanied by BLIP! PING! BOINK!-type sound effects that sound like they came from a 60s sci-fi film or an Atari game. Cozzi has no shame at all as he lifts scenes from Conan, Clash of the Titans(the scene where Herc faces the gorgon is identical to Perseus’ in Clash!), and The Beastmaster. The entire opening credits of the second film directly ripoff the credit sequence from Superman 2, with the blue credits in outer station floating into the hide intercut with scenes from the first film! The second film goes a bit overboard with animation, even including a fight that could have advance straight from a Ralph Bakshi movie. Lou is a amazing Hercules(eat your heart out, Sorbo!) . He’s no Olivier, but do you really need to be for this kind of film? I don’t deem there’s a single actor in the world who looks more like a Hercules than Lou Ferrigno. I adore these two films, care for em to death. They’re unfamiliar, wacky, comic and 100% fun. Peter Jackson can support his sillyass gazillion dollar hobbits. I’ll win Hercules.
Yeah, I know, the Ferrigno “Hercules” movies are truly lame. The acting is basic, the stories are comical, and the effects aren’t cutting edge. More like dreary edge. Yet and quiet, I enjoyed watching these movies as a kid. When I found out both movies were released on DVD I had to add it to my collection. I judge they were colossal adventure flicks. Lou Ferrigno actually did a exquisite worthy job in the acting department and William Berger is deliciously mischeivious as the diabolicol King Minos. If you enjoyed the sword and sorcery fun of movies like “Beastmaster” and “Red Sonja” and “Conan” or impartial a nutty retro freak then this DVD is one to opinion.
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